I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
