The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
It was confusing and full of hummus
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
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