Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
