are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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