WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
