I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
