I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
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