We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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