bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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