writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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