She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
