i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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