she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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