You're a womanizer and a bitch.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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