Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize