Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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