Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
This gyro tastes like lonliness
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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