so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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