Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
