i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just gift wrapped bread.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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