I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
