please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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