i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
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