How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
