Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
