she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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