I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
there's paper in my vomit.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
