Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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