I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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