I don't remember. Are we still dating?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
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If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
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Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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