Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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