There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
