She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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