i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
