Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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