I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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