i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
