all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
