she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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