I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
