My brain says no but my pants say off.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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