you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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