I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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