Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
