I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
