i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
