im drinking this country out of the recession.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize