now i know why i became what i already was.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
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I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
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Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize