More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
