that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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